Who vs. Whom—Which Word Should You Use? Many English learners, even native speakers, struggle with choosing between who and whom. Here’s a simple method: imagine the missing person in the sentence.
Examples:
The above rule is based on the difference between subjects and objects. If the missing person is a subject in the sentence, use who. If the missing person is an object, use whom.
Estimated reading time: 6 minutes
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Who vs. whom is confusing for two reasons. Firstly, grammar rules are confusing. That’s a fact. Secondly, informal spoken English is changing, and it doesn’t always follow the rules. The latter condition makes us question using whom even when we’re sure we should! Let’s try to help you sort it all out, starting with an easy rule that will work almost all the time.
The fastest way to decide between who and whom is:
✅ If you can answer with he/she, use who
✅ If you can answer with him/her, use whom
Example: Who/Whom did you invite?
✅ Imagine the answer: I invited ____ (him). → Whom did you invite?
Example: Who/Whom is responsible?
✅ Imagine the answer: ____ is responsible (he). → Who is responsible?
As we said above, this rule is based on the difference between subjects and objects. If the missing person is a subject in the sentence, use who. If the missing person is an object, use whom.
Native-Speaker Tip: In casual speech, native-English speakers often say who even when whom is technically correct. But in formal situations, using whom properly can make you sound polished and professional. And if you are taking an English test, such as Cambridge or IELTS, be sure to choose the grammatically correct answer!
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Certain clues can tell you when whom is required in formal English:
Prepositions like to, for, about, with signal that “whom” is correct in formal English.
✅ To whom should I address the letter? (I should address it to him.)
✅ With whom are you traveling? (I am traveling with him.)
Informal speech: “Who should I send it to?” is common usage and sounds fine in conversational English, but is technically wrong!
A transitive verb requires an object. If who/whom is receiving the action, use whom.
✅ Whom did you trust? (I trusted him.)
✅ Whom did you call? (I called her.)
Example: “She couldn’t decide who/whom she wanted as a mentor.”
✅ Imagine: She wanted ____ (him) as a mentor. → Whom she wanted
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Now for the toughest who and whom cases!
If who/whom is part of a longer phrase, imagine the missing person in the sentence.
Example: “I don’t know who/whom I should hire.”
✅ Imagine: I should hire ____ (him). → Whom I should hire
Comparisons can be tricky because they often have missing words in the sentence.
Example: “She is smarter than who/whom?”
✅ Imagine: She is smarter than ____ is (he). → Who
Example: “She has helped more people than who/whom?”
✅ Imagine: She has helped more people than she has helped ____ (him). → Whom
Relative clauses add extra information about a person. If the person is receiving an action, use whom.
Example: “The employee who/whom we promoted was very experienced.”
✅ Imagine: We promoted ____ (him). → Whom
Example: “The teacher who/whom helped me was kind.”
✅ Imagine: ____ helped me (he). → Who
Native-Speaker Tip: In spoken English, who is commonly used even when whom is correct.
Rephrasing is all about figuring out the missing part of the sentence. Think like a detective! Who did it? Or to whom did it happen?
1️⃣ Most of the time, it means imagining the answer to a question.
2️⃣ Sometimes, rephrasing means finding missing words in a comparison.
In this situation, both who and whom can be correct! The meaning changes slightly based on whether “than” acts as a conjunction or a preposition.
3️⃣ In relative clauses, rephrasing means checking if the word is the subject or object.
1️⃣ (Who/Whom) should we invite to the meeting?
2️⃣ (Who/Whom) is leading the discussion?
3️⃣ To (who/whom) did you give the report?
4️⃣ (Who/Whom) do you admire the most?
5️⃣ With (who/whom) are you working on this project?
Scroll down to see the who vs. whom quiz answers.
👇 Answers:
1️⃣ Whom (We should invite him.)
2️⃣ Who (He is leading the discussion.)
3️⃣ Whom (You gave the report to him.)
4️⃣ Whom (You admire him the most.)
5️⃣ Whom (You are working with him.)
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Use who when the missing person is he/she/they (the subject of the sentence).
Rephrase the sentence. If you can replace the word with him/her/them, use whom.
In formal writing, yes. In spoken English, most people say “who” instead of “whom”, even when “whom” is technically correct.
Usually, yes. Phrases like “to whom,” “for whom,” “with whom” are correct in formal English.
Not entirely, but it’s becoming less common in everyday speech. In professional and academic writing, “whom” is still expected in formal contexts.
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The Ultimate Guide to Who vs. Whom: Easy Tips & Tough Challenges by Brenda de Jong-Pauley, MA, Director, The English Center. The English Center provides CEDEO-erkend, quality English and Business English courses in the Netherlands and everywhere online. Always with a native-speaker trainer. Visit our pages for–